The plan vs reality


I think parenting is a constant battle of coming to terms with the reality of a situation when it doesn’t live up to your plans.

In a perfect world we could predetermine our child’s behavior and the way in which we could deal with that behavior, but as with every aspect of life, we need to remain flexible and be willing to adjust the way in which we parent to suit the circumstances.

What works now, won’t always work and what works with one child won’t necessarily work with another.

The other day I met a new mother who said that before she had her baby she had decided that her bub would be fully breastfed and under no circumstances would she co-sleep or use a dummy. It turns out that to keep her sanity she now does all those things, but I think it shows resilience and flexibility to be able to change tact to find ways that work for you and your child.

I worry that too many people seem to shame parents for their way of parenting when we should support each other and understand that we don’t live in a perfect world with perfect children. We have to just do the best we can and not be too hard on ourselves if things deviate from our original plan.

There’s no right or wrong in parenting, there is what is just what is right for you at the time.

All parents are winging it and trying their best, so relax and don’t be so hard on yourself if things don’t turn out the way you originally planned.

(Photo courtesy of nenetus,

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